The final blog!

Looking back at all my blog posts made me realize the importance of blogging. Throughout the year I never looked forward to the weekly blog, but now I see that a blog is a way to express yourself. Everyone got to type their opinions and share them with the many other students in Mrs. Gilman's English class; even the quiet students who rarely ever share were given a voice. My blog has taught me to open up and share my ideas. After reading my blog I noticed that the first few were very organized and sounded like an essay, but as the year progressed my writing style and voice transformed. My writing began to sound more like I was speaking to the reader or like the reader was listening to my thoughts; I could see where I began to feel more comfortable expressing my own view on a situation. Also, my opinions have definately changed. While reading my past blogs I continually disagreed with what I wrote, for example in the "Writing About Reading" blog I wrote that I can read in loud places, but once I read that I immediately realized that now reading isn't an easy task for me when there's noise surrounding me. One of the blogs that I read that I was amazed by was the Animal Farm project. For the project I wrote a poem and the thing that amazed me was the little details that I put in it; I felt proud that that was the poem I had written. Speaking of animals, I noticed that I used birds as metaphors quite a bit...okay well only twice, but those were about the only two times where we had to think of a metaphor for the book we were reading in class. Throughout the year the blog has helped me develop a multitude of skills. It has taught me a new way of writing, embedding/citing quotes, supporting my main points, creating imagery, finding themes, literary analysis, and many more skills that will help me throughout my english(and possible college) career. Seeing my development through the year is a great experience. I get to see that I have learned and matured throughout my year in honors english. Also, we blogged about almost every book we read in class and we had to discuss the literary analysis behind each book multiple times. I discovered just how much I worked on analyzing those books and how it paid off in the end. By reading the blogs for the books I saw that Great Expectations was definately the book that I seemed the understand the most, even though it was very long. I feel that this blog is about self expression and learning how to state your opinions and feelings. Don Miguel Ruiz once said, "The freedom we are looking for is the freedom to be ourselves, to express ourselves." By expressing ourselves we find who we are. The blog has made my voice louder; I've learned that sharing your ideas not only helps your brain develop, but it also helps you develop who you are.

Essay Writing: Challenges and Congquests

Am I an accomplished essayist? Well, throughout the year I've definately learned and aquired the skills to write a good essay, but I don't consider myself an accomplished essayist. There are still things that I could do differently and many skills that I will learn in the years to come. Also, and accomplished essayist should feel confident of there work, and that is one thing that I lack. Literary analysis is the process of delving into the book and understanding not only what is happening, but what everything within the work means. Sometimes it can be challenging because it isn't always obvious. Often times you have to dig down deep to find the true meaning. The reward is that you understand the book and you have used the skills you have developed; overall you feel accomplished and smart.

The conclusion is most likely the thing that would bring my paper down to a B. Yes, it concludes the paper, but it sounds a bit choppy and rushed. It seems like it lowers the essays quality. The essay is also lacking in transitions between my points, which is something that is necessary in order to seperate the ideas from one another. I might have drifted from the thesis a bit, but overall I stayed with it. Plus, my quotes weren't properlly embedded because I didn't place a "slash"(/) after the end of a line, but I plan to fix that before turning it in. Overall, this essay was a challenge, and without the skills of literary analysis it would have been nearly impossible.

Summer Reading!

The first book that's on my reading list is The Deep End of Fear by Elizabeth Chandler. I've read a few books by that author and I haven't found one that I didn't enjoy! The book is about a girl named Kate whose sister drowned 12 years ago in her old home. Now Kate is returning to that home to tutor a boy named Patrick. Throughout her stay Patrick is doing dangerous and life threatening things because "Ashley dared him to." Also, the boy who Kate loves admits a dark secret that connects him to Ashley. Kate must push aside her fears of her sister in order to save everyone from her the evil that is supposedly her "sister."


Another book I would like to read is The Pianist by Wladyslaw Szpilman. This story is a true story about the author and his surviving the Holocaust thanks to a Nazi. He was a famous Jewish pianist before him and his family were sent to a death camp. When they were getting into the train that would take them off to their dath a friend of his who was a Jewish police officer pulled him out of the crowd and told him to run. For the next few years of the Holocaust he has people hide him in various homes, but he is caught by a Nazi; however, the officer hears him playing the piano and decides to help Szpilman survive. Without the officers realization that he's just a man trying to live, he wouldn't have survived through the holocaust. The Holocaust is the one thing in history that I am fascinated with. What the Jews went through was terrible and I find it amazing that some had the will and strength to survive.

Theme and Motif: Fate

My astrological sign is Virgo. Virgos are perfectionists and that definately holds true for me; I'm not a perfectionist in a way that everything has to be right. For me everything just needs to look neat and orderly; which, brings me to yet another trait that is correct: Virgos are very tidy. Also, they are very practical which is also another one of my personality traits. I tend to look at the true facts rather than be over dramatic about things and think it's the end of the world. My sign is supposedly smart which, yes, I do think I'm smart, but I don't think I'm SUPER smart. Strangely, there are many traits of a virgo that I do have. Virgos pay attention to detail, they're shy and modest, they are patient, they are reliable, and the list of qualities that are common for me could go on for awhile.


After realizing all the characteristics I have in common I believe that there could be possible relevance; however, it could just be a coincidence. Astrology is the same a stereotyping. At times it can turn out to be true but at other times it's the complete opposite. My feelings are mixed. I also believe that the person has most of the effect of "fate". If they get their daily horoscope and truly follow it than their actions will effect what happens in life; however, someone who doesn't follow it won't have such a defined path; they follow their own rules. In Act 3 once Mercutio dies Romeo states,"This day's black fate on more days doth depend."(3.1.124) One person's action has affected everyone's future. I don't call that "fate" because anyone can alter their future by simply changing their ways. Also, Romeo believes that death is better than banishment since he cannot be with Juliet; however, if he had given up he would truly be dead. His time to die wasn't then; his action fought off fate/death. He's given the chance to see Juliet and be with her; I consider that luck; it wasn't something that was going to happend for sure.Yes, one day the time will come when they do die and death is the ONLY true fate for them or anyone. The only thing that predicts our future is our actions, nothing is permanent and set in stone until it happens. The only true "fate" we have is death which is a constant theme throughout the play. Things are born into this world and once they are done, they die.

Culture Shock

Romeo and Juliet by The Killers

A love struck Romeo, sings the streets a serenade
Laying everybody low, with a love song that he made
He finds the street light, steps out of the shade
'n' says something like, "You and me babe, how about it?"
Juliet says, "Hey it's Romeo, you nearly gave me a heart attack"
He's underneath the window, she's singing, 'Hey la, my boyfriend's back
You shouldn't come around here, singing up at people like that'
Anyway, what you gonna do about it?
Juliet, the dice was loaded from the start,
And I bet, then you exploded in my heart,
And I forget, I forget, the movie song
When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong, Juliet?
Come up on different streets, they both were streets of shame,
Both dirty, both mean, yes, and the dream was just the same,
And I dreamed your dream for you, and now your dream is real
How can you look at me as if I was just another one of your deals?
You can fall for chains of silver, you can fall for chains of gold
You can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold
You promised me everything, you promised me thick and thin, yeah
Now you just say, "Oh Romeo, yeah, you know I used to have a scene with him"
Juliet, when we made love you used to cry
I said "I love you like the stars above, I'll love you till I die"
And there's a place for us, you know the movie song
When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong, Juliet?
I can't do the talks, like they talk on the TV
And I can't do a love song, like the way it's meant to be
I can't do everything, but I'll do anything for you
I can't do anything 'cept be in love with you
And all I do is miss you and the way we used to be
And all I do is keep the beat, 'n the band company
And all I do is kiss you, through the bars of a rhyme
Juliet, I'd do the stars with you, anytime
Juliet, when we made love you used to cry
I said "I love you like the stars above, I'll love you till I die"
And there's a place for us, you know the movie song
When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong, Juliet?
And a love struck Romeo, sings the streets a serenade,
Laying everybody low, with a love song that he made
He finds a convenient street light, steps out of the shade
'n' says something like, "You and me babe, how about it?"

This song does refer to the story of Romeo and Juliet since both names are mentioned in this song; however, in this version Juliet, after having a relationship with Romeo, lost her feelings for him. Romeo is still in love with Juliet though and the only way he can express it is through this "love song." I just recently came across this song and it made me think that Romeo and Juliet would be extremely tragic if they lost their love for one another; the story would lose its appeal.

Extra Credit Blog: English Reflection

If I were to go back in time and watch myself in Honors English this year I think I would be blown away. When I chose this class I knew that it would be a challenge, but I never would have imagined just how much effort I've had to put into it. It isn't just about reading a book and taking a huge test on it. There are many hidden meanings throughout a story. It's like finding buried treasure: sometimes you find the gold(in this case understanding it and having that "ah hah!" moment) or sometimes you come to find nothing. Ah and the ongoing topic of motif. That was a hard concept to grasp but now picking up on a motif almost comes naturally; in fact, one of my close friends actually finds motifs while we're watching a movie. It'll be completely silent and all of a sudden I'll hear, "That could be a motif!" Also, acting is a big part of English this year from Great Expectation skits to reading The Importance of Being Earnest aloud in class. Reflecting back I realize that yes, English isn't my favorite subject in the entire universe, but it's never the same. It has also taught me many MANY things from something as simple as grammar to something that seems as pointless as diagramming sentences. English has definately brought out the motivation within me.

Skit Prep

One part that I think should be a skit is when Pip first meets the convict when he is a small boy. He's frightened by the convict and helps him out by giving him food and a file. The file is a big motif throughout the book and the whole event is the basis of Pip's ongoing feelings of guilt. The scene also introduces a very important character; although we don't know that he's important during that scene.

Another good scene to act out would be when Pip goes to see Miss Havisham and Estella at the Satis House for the first time. Estella constantly reminds Pip of his common boy traits and it makes Pip very self conscious. Pip's first visiting is the start of his "chain." Without that start he wouldn't have wanted to become a gentleman so badly. He might've treated people with more respect. The skit would show the basis of Pip's feelings throughout the story and his relationship to Estella and Miss Havisham.

The last scene that I suggest is when Pip goes to Wemmick's house for the first time. At his house Wemmick's is cheerful and lighthearted; the complete opposite from at work. Wemmick's at work and at home is a big contrast and really shows his and Pip's relationship. Wemmick's is one of the few people who Pip trusts with everything. Also the Aged Parent shows his caring side!

More Questions About Great Expectations

In chapter 42 Abel Magwitch is telling Pip and Herbert the events of his life. Well while he is concluding discussing Arthur and Compeyson Herbert is writing in a book cover. Within the book cover he is writing a message to Pip that says, "Young Havisham's name was Arthur. Compeyson is the man who professed to be Miss Havisham's lover."(352) So Compeyson is the man who broke Miss Havisham's heart and part of the reason why she is bitter and wants revenge. The thing I don't under stand is the young Havisham Arthur. Yes, he worked with/for Compeyson but since he's a young Havisham is he related to Miss Havisham? Or is it just a coincidence?

Great Expectations: A Question About a Passage

Before I ask whoever is reading this my question I'm going to inform you that the pages in my book do not match up with the ones in the books that most people have. The page I cite will be around the actual correct page though!


When Estella arrives in London her and Pip go to a little room for tea. While in the room Estella's mood turns dark as the topic of Miss Havisham and her aquintances comes up and she says,"It is not easy for even you," said Estella, "to know what satisfaction it gives me to see those people thwarted, or what an enjoyable sense of the ridiculous I have when they are made ridiculous. For you were not brought up in that strange house from a mere baby.-I was. You had not your little wits sharpened by their intriguing against you, suppressed and defenceless, under the mask of sympathy and pity and what not that is soft and soothing.-I had."(267 ch. 33) I understand that Estella has negative feelings towards Miss Havisham's relations. I understand that Estella has negatives feelings for Miss Havisham's aquantences and that they show sympathy and pity for her but since it's a "mask of sympathy and pity" they're covering their true feelings towards Estella. So my question is what are their actual feelings regarding Estella?

Great Expectations: Photo

The picture I chose was of a baby bird leaving its nest for the first time in its life. Think of the itty bitty bird as Pip. The bird must leave its home in order to learn more about the world around it and grow up. Pip must also leave his family and village in order to become a gentleman. He has no idea what lies ahead in his journey, just as a baby bird is oblivious to the ways of the world. As both their knowledges increase they will grow and begin to thrive in various ways. For Pip his growth will lead to him becoming a gentleman and having "great expectations."

Great Expectations: The First Stage

"Pause you who read this, and think for a moment of the long chain of iron or gold, of thorns or flowers, that would never have bound you, but for the formation of the first link on one memorable day." In the quote Pip is referring to his first visit at Miss Havisham's. During his visit Estella says,"With this boy! Why, he is a common labouring-boy!"(60) and follows up later with, "He calls the knaves, Jacks, this boy!....and what coarse hands he has. And what thick boots!"(60) Once Estella says these things, Pip begins to change. He feels ashamed and embarrassed because he doesn't want to be low class and have people react/treat him how Estella had; he doesn't want people to patronize him. After this day Pip was more aware of social standings and how his actions affected that. He constantly worried of people, especially Miss Havisham and Estella, finding out of his "unclassy" behavior and messy job.

A day that began my "chain" was during the summer. Someone close to me, who cannot be named, was taken to the hospital after hurting herself from being unhappy. Once I heard what had happened it definately changed my outlook on life and the way I live. She let stress and unhappiness overpower her and she gave into it. After that day I decided that I never wanted to be in that situation so I changed. I began to think happier and try to not give into stress by doing things that would keep me happy and looking forward. I wasn't going to concentrate on my mistakes anymore; I didn't want to endure that much pain like she had. I also had to step up and become mature so I could watch over her and make sure she stayed balanced, emotionally, and not repeat what had happened.

The Importance of Being Earnest Group Essay

Group Essay Thesis: In the play The Importance of Being Earnest Oscar Wilde uses dialogue to represent the individual styles of each relationship in order to convey the stereotypical relationships in the Victorian Era.

In my paragraph my main topic is Algernon and Cecily's relationship and how it is exaggerated and semi-fake. My first point is how Cecily fell in love with Algernon("Ernest") from hearing about him. In order to love someone you need to meet the person so you can get to know the real person. Plus by hearing about the person you may be told lies in order to make the person seem better and more suitable.

My second point is how Algernon Falls in love with Cecily mainly for her beauty and appearance. Beauty was important in the Victorian Era since a woman who isn't appealing to a man wouldn't be married off quite as easily as a woman who is very pretty. Also beauty can shield one's personality from people and by being "blind" a person might overlook and be oblivious to unpleasant personality traits.

My third and final point in my paragraph is how people, mainly women in this case, make up or fantasize of a relationship to make themselves feel wanted and needed. Like Cecily, women that live in the country don't have many eligible men to meet and flirt with, so they think of their ideal relationship. If they dream and imagine too much they may eventually convince themselves that their ideal made up relationship is reality.

The Importance of Being Earnest/Victorian Research

My research on the Victorian Era has helped me understand the play The Importance of Being Earnest. The research made it so I understood social classes, education, and marriage. Many young girls did not go to school and instead learned daily housework skills for bettering their life as a housewife in their future, however in the play Cecily is taught school subjects such as German. She's not taught skills around the house; most likely since she is of higher class and people of higher class were more often taught lessons than those of lower class because they would have servants if they married into a rich family. Also marriage in the Victorian Era was more of a business deal or arranged rather than out of true feelings. As Lady Bracknell states, "When you do become engaged to someone,I, or your father, should his health permit him, will inform you of the fact.....It is hardly a matter that she could be allowed to arrange herself."(p. 23) Gwendolen and Jack ("Ernest") want to be married since they love each other, but they cannot since Jack/Ernest does not have a promising background, instead his background is unknown and seems to have originated in the lower class according to Lady Bracknell.

The different social classes do not generally socialize with one another other than for business. For example, Lane works as a servent for Algernon and doesn't talk to him other than what is necessary like telling of someone's arrival or bring something which he was asked to retrieve. Most of the time Lane just gives an acknowledging answer such as, "Yes sir," and "Name of person arriving." The middle class has more association with those of higher class such as Miss Prism and Dr. Chasuble who socialize with the Worthings, but still have business with them. In the higher class background is very important. If you come from a long line of well-known, important people or from a wealthy family than you're of high class, but if you're in the high class and your background is uncertain, like Jack's (John and "Ernest"), than people may not think quite as highly of you. Because of Jack's unknown background he was not eligible to marry Gwendolen. To be of high class you must come from high decent. The research on the Victorian Era greatly improved my knowledge of The Importance of Being Earnest and made me aware of and understand multiple social situations, circumstances, and restrictions of that era that are within the play.

Animal Farm Poem: Revision of the Past

BANG

A gunshot dances

Across the October breeze

Bringing remembrance

of a battle unseen.

Dense fog surrounds

The unravelling dream

of animals charging

towards their enemy.

One pig up front

Scans the scene

Turns on his hooves

Exclaiming, "Long live humanity!"

Now aiding the enemy

He's marked a traitor

Receiving wounds in turn

For working with the instigator.

But the fog slowly rises

Revealing the truth

of the scene imagined

That persuaded

The brutes.

The pig in the front

Fought without harm

He never abandoned

The Animal Farm.

False words

Turned a nation

Against their own kin

Who knew a revision

Could cause such an end.

The past is the past

And should never be altered

Don't let a lie

Cause you to falter.

Poetry Out Loud Performances

The poem "Facing it" by Yusef Komunyakaa was recited by Brandan Emanual Wellington. Once the play button was pushed I was immediately drawn in by his confidence and voice. He added a haunting sorrow to the tone in his voice and it gives the listener goose bumps. Brandan's dramatization was remarkable. He was telling the audience the story and showing movements, actively involving the audience in the poem. Without a doubt, he clearly understood the meaning of the poem by his confident air and his voice. While Brandan recited the poem you saw the emotions expressed in his facial features and within his tone; it revealed the emotional meaning behind the poem. Part way through the poem I was ignorant to the fact that I was sitting at my house; I felt as if I were "in" the actions within the poem. By the end of the poem I longed to hear Brandan recite more peotry.

The meaning behind "Facing it" is not a pleasant, happy poem, as can be told by Brandan's voice that was, through out the recitation, sad and bone chilling. The poem simply told the truth behind war and the hardships of life; many sacrifices are made whether they are bad or good. The event most focused on was the Vietnam War. In fact, the author/speaker places us at the site of the Vietnam Memorial and describes the names scribed into the marble representing the many lost lives. At this time Brandan's voice had a ring of regret and longing to change what had happened. Many times throughout life you will regret the decisions you make, but you must live with them; that's the truth. You can't go back in time and change what has already been done; learn from what has happened.

Mockingbird Motif

After reading To Kill a Mockingbird the definition of motif was clear to me. I often mix up symbolism and motif however, the novel showed me that a motif enhances the meaning of things or themes within the story. The novel helped me understand motif since it explained the meaning of the motif within the themes and actions that portrayed the themes. The motif really helped me grasp the true meaning behind To Kill a Mockingbird. The part where I understood the motif the most was when Tom Robinson was caught while trying to escape the prison. Just like a mockingbird he was shot dead when he was in fact completely innocent; he was the victim. If the novel hadn't given examples to enhance the motif I wouldn't have been able to follow the story line and the meaning behind the novel.The motif is very simple: a mockingbird. It's thought to be a sin to kill a mockingbird since the bird is purely innocent and hasn't done anything harmful or wrong. You can relate that to life; it's wrong to blame someone who is innocent.

Without the motif the many themes within the pages of To Kill a Mockingbird would be pointless. All the themes follow the motif that it's wrong to blame something/someone who is not guilty. Throughout the book the motif is spread out and explained through different themes such as prejudice in all forms, standing in someone's shoes, and growing up. When you're being prejudice you're against a person, thing, or even a race and that theme was showed through Tom Robinson's case and through the Cunninghams even. People of lower class and race were blamed for things they did not do. As you grow up you realize things and as little kids Jem and Scout blamed Boo for doing things that he didn't do. After Scout realized Boo/Arthur had killed Bob Ewell she said that it wasn't Boo/Arthur because she didn't want Boo to go through court and be blamed. He had already been through many hard times and he was trying to protect Scout and Jem, not harm them. The motif is the base of the themes and shows that each theme/issue is not right and that blaming others/things for your problems could lead to unjust conclusions.

Symbolism (Extra Credit)

The character I portrayed was Mayella Ewell. The symbol I chose was a plain looking bird who is trapped in its cage. Mayella is of lower class so, like the bird who is plain, she is thought of to be an outcast from society. Also the cage represents how trapped she is. In her house she is the only one who tries to make progress, but her father, Bob Ewell, beats her, which makes her crave attention and freedom from her home and family. Once Tom Robinson shows kindness towards her and acts like he's releasing her, her urge for freedom becomes great and she acts rash. However, her actions caused her to feel a great amount of guilt, and that guilt turns into a new cage that will keep her trapped within her own feelings.

Life Lesson

Throughout my life I've heard many different tidbits of advice such as don't eat yellow snow. Although that piece of advice has stayed with me, that's not the advice that has really helped and impacted me. When I was younger and I was fighting with my sister or arguing with a friend my mom would always say, "remove yourself from the situation." Whenever she said that it usually meant she was getting impatient and needed us to take a chill pill. By stepping down and leaving the argument alone you can calm down and clearly think out the problem without anger and rage blocking out your sense of right and wrong. I don't know how many times this quote has been used by my mom, but all I can infer is that it's been over used for many years now. Even though it's over used I never get tired of hearing this quote since it reminds me to give myself time to before jumping to conclusions.

To many this lesson would seem pointless and inferior compared to other life lessons, but to me it holds important meaning. As a child I would always jump to conclusions and get angry, but bit by bit I learned to remove myself rather than dwell on and continually pester whoever happened to be the unlucky victim of my complaints. Today I do occasionally keep a subject rather than dropping it, but rarely do I ever get to the point in a fight where anger is seeping from me. Many times I've kept my temper and avoided unnecessary actions; it even helps when others are arguing and, all I tell them is "drop it" or "stop talking about it." As a child I didn't understand how walking away would help; I just thought it was another way of saying 'I surrender, you win.' It took me a few years to decipher the true meaning, but now I hold it close. When you keep at it you or others can get seriously injured, physically, mentally, or emotionally which really isn't necessary. The best way to solve differences is to calmly and patiently discuss with the other person in order to clarify what you disagree on, not jumping to conclusions and acting on a whim.

My Best Friend!

I hate playing favorites, but my best friend out of ALL my friends would have to be Julia! She has medium-length curly brown hair and brown eyes. When Julia doesn't know a person very well it's challenging for her to open up to them completely. She speaks spanish fluently and detests peanut butter because, in her opinion, it looks strange. She always has an aura of peacefulness and cheeriness surrounding her, so whenever I'm with her I can't help but be happy and relaxed just like her. One thing that I advise a person not to do is to mispronounce her name. Once you mispronounce it she says, "It's pronounced Hulia NOT Julia, gosh!" Also, she recently decided to become a vegetarian and stop eating meat; that ties in with her don't pollute and keep the earth clean motto.

At first you would perceive Julia as an introvert since she can keep to herself when she doesn't know you, however with time her personality morphs into more of an ambivert and she will begin to open up like a flower early in the morning. Once Julia opens up you see that she's intense and strong-willed; her will power won't let her give up easily. I'll admit she's a bit of a hippie; not a bad drug-user hippie, but one who cares about nature and others. She's very attentive to people's emotions and can sense when something is wrong. For her being an altruist comes naturaly; she doesn't have to force herself to care or worry about others in order to seem nice, in fact, it's like she has an extra sixth sense.

Early Memory

Imagine a sparkling, clean kitchen that was freshly cleaned. Two little girls are opening cupboards and pulling out various ingredients; what they are making is a mystery. Those two teeny siblings were my sister and me. I don't remember our ages, but I do remember the story in great detail. For some odd reason we decided not to use the table/counter to mix the dough and to flour the "cookies"; we used the floor instead. I'm not sure whether the floor was clean or not at the time, but we didn't care, obviously.

You know how most normal cookies are made with sugar, flour, eggs, milk, water, etc? Well mine and my sister's cookies were made with JUST water and flour. Now just imagine how horrid and icky that goopy cookie would be. To make the creation even worse we didn't bake the cookies; we just cut them out using a cookie cutter and gave them to my mom and dad to eat. That seems just evil to me now that I really think of it. I mean my mom and dad HAD to eat the cookies to seem nice since that's their role in being parents.

Another part of this memory is my parents emotions. When they saw the hugungous mess of flour and gloopy batter covering all the tile in the kitchen they were pretty mad. They didn't show it too much around us, but, really, who wouldn't be mad if their kitchen was completely covered in disgusting cookies? I'm pretty sure everyone would be frustrated at that point. Thankfully my cooking skills have improved since then, and I'm now perfectly capable of making cookies...as long as they're premade and ready to throw into the oven!